Seeing Upside Down

I've been thinking a lot lately. Occasionally, this tends to be a bad thing. In this case, it is. I thought absence makes the heart grow fonder. Maybe I'm just kidding myself. Maybe I don't deserve it. I sit here, clicking through photos, thinking of the times and contexts in which they were snapped, permanently recorded in history.

I'm so indifferent right now to him. I'm fine, almost content, with not seeing him for another two weeks. I get home on a Monday, a holiday. I could drive down that day to see him. But I'm not. I want to, but I'm choosing not to. I'll wait until the weekend, at the earliest. Who knows, I may just wait until the following weekend. But that's almost like avoidance.

I was talking to Rachel today. She was telling me about how her desire to go to WWU was monumental. Once upon a time. Now, she no longer desires it. She's wondering where that passion went. I can relate. I wanted something so badly at one point, I burned out and no longer cared. Maybe I've hit that point. That I missed him so much, I no longer care if I see him right away when I get home.

Maybe I'm just thinking too much. I need to stop...